This looks like an awkward question. Who will confess that he/she is not lovable? But the truth is that many of us are not lovable at all. Take for instance; we all know how innocent a kid is, he/she knows nothing and is totally defenseless right? Now you love the kid, because he/ she want you to protect him/her. You love the kid because of his/her innocence. You love the kid because of the smiling face. You love the kid because the kid has no malice towards anyone, does not desire anything bad for any one, does not recognize enemies and has faith in everyone. The kid is totally free of all negative emotions. That is why we all love a kid. They are always lovable. Why?
While thinking of the answer to that question, how many of us are like that? How many of us can keep a smile on our face for a long time? How many of us are free of negative emotions? Not many. I understand that we are grownups and cannot be like a kid. But surely we can borrow some good qualities from the kid. How about forgiving everyone? How about not getting angry at all times? How about having faith in everyone unless proven otherwise?
A friend once told me how his uncle will never believe you when you try to paint someone negatively before him, despite not knowing the person he will totally trust the person unless the individual in question gives him reasons to doubt him/her.
How about loving everyone? How about becoming nonjudgmental?
Knowing if you are Lovable starts from you. It starts from learning to accept and love yourself. Do not compare yourself with others. Learn to see the value in who you are! You are who you are, what else can you be? Just be you! True, not everybody may choose to accept you or see your worth, but who are they to judge you? You have a choice to find your authentic self and live an empowered life and empower others with your presence. Love yourself first, and assume that as you are a good judge of character, then others will love you.
I totally agree that there are people who can never love because they are psychologically damaged. No matter what, they can never love you. It not their fault, its either they are incapable of love (this is a temporary state, but with some it stays for a lifetime), or they do not resonate with you and your message. In retrospect, we all know such people can never love themselves, and so what made you think they will love you? You just have to accept it whether you like it or not. You are not meant to be everything to everybody, and no one is loved by everybody.
When you find yourself in such scenario, what you should do is, love those people who love you. Did someone just ask if I should ignore those that do not love me? No! You don’t have to but you should also bear in mind that, you do not live for them.
In most individual cases, we really can’t tell whether or not someone loves us at all. Things like numbers of followers Instagram or Facebook really don’t tell you much, about love. Too many lonely people exist as free radicals looking for a thing to latch on to, refracting anything they come across. Some people will love you, no matter how bad you are, just like your family. But some people won’t love you, no matter how good you are. Everybody cannot be your cheerleader.
That’s where chemistry comes to play. Chemistry is that indefinable something that brings people together. It isn’t a guarantee it’s just there. Once we acquire some of these qualities, we will become lovable. Believe me, it is that simple. All of your friends and colleagues will begin liking you more. You will get love from unexpected quarters. You will get your dream darling in a little time, after you transform yourself.
Do you want to be loved by people? Here are some few things to start doing and you will be shocked at how people will love and appreciate you.
- Be yourself.
- Stop complaining over every little thing.
- Be affectionate.
- Be a good listener.
- Be friendly Exude Confidence.
- Be empathetic.
- Keep your emotions in check.
- Be confident.
- Be humble.
- Learn everything that will make you better individual than you were yesterday, both personally and professionally.
- Grow, improve and never stop.
Bearing all these in mind and working toward achieving them will help us solve the puzzle about whether we are lovable or not. Try not to be anything, but be something. Be hundred percent (100%) made up of person you want to be, so no part of you sucks at other people to be whole.
Written by: JONATHAN JULIANA
Image: Stock photo
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