Do guys ever regret losing a good girl? A lot of ladies have times without number asked this question. You have all the qualities of a good girl, but you are always at the losing end. Do guys ever stop to think, my God! I just lost a good girl out of my carelessness?
I have lost quite a number of several good persons by my side. And most times, it is avoidable. It makes me feel extremely sad, and I want to punish myself the wildest way I can. Often, the intensity of guilt is quite overwhelming, and I find it hard to come out of it. You will always feel sad when you lose a good person. Be it a business partner, friendship. or a love interest.
I took my time, asking a few male friends, and some said they never regret anything while some still feel regret especially, when they know they were at fault. A particular guy said he lost a girl who has great affection for him. He cannot help but wonder what went wrong, and he cannot place his hand on a particular reason why it happened. At some point in time, he summoned the courage to try and get in touch again but to no avail, and as he goes through life, he will always have that regret.
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Most guys might feel those kinds of regrets but will move on. It is usually futile to try and get together again, as there are always some good reasons for a break-up. But some guys are narcissists and a bit shallow. They do not care. They would choose to go out with someone who is not a match to them, someone who will accept mostly everything from him. She agrees, she compromises, and she is comfortable doing it.
A good girl is not just someone who understands the guy properly but also one who knows where to step back.
As women, we must understand that men like variety; they miss what they do not have or have not had for a while. It does not matter if you are the prettiest girl in the world. It would still not be enough to keep a man’s interest in only you.
Often, men need to let a woman go just as a woman needs to let go of a man for incompatibility reasons. Listen, the fact I let a man who loves me go does not mean that I do not love him or care about him. It just means I have figured out that we do not work together, and it is best if we both move on. I know some men are hard, selfish, uncaring, and find it very easy walking away from a woman who loves them. I assure you, not all men are the same.
When dating a good girl, she will need commitment, respect, support, and these can be way too much for some guys. Unfortunately, these ladies are the types that fall in love with a narcissist. They tend to make bad choices easily. Sensible men know that losing a good woman is a huge setback. She does not just walk away alone, but she carries her compassion, love, respect, strength, and affection along with her. And it is an irreversible process. You only have one option: To prepare yourself for the rest without them.
Here are thing you lose when you lose a good woman:
- They are hard to come by and difficult to replace.
- They have skills and willingness to comfort you when the rest of the world turns against you.
- They love you despite your weaknesses and stay loyal to you because of your strengths.
- They will make sacrifices for you and those you love without murmuring and complaining.
- Your dreams are hers.
- They know what makes you vulnerable and never use that against you.
- They will survive your rejection and lived to tell about it.
Something will always be missing, and it will never be complete when you lose a good woman. There will always be a vacuum. But there are different solutions, and you have to listen to your heart instead of your mind if you are really in love.
You may find yourself in a situation where the man is asking for a second chance. Keep in mind that on and off relationships are complex because you see parts of the person you like and other parts you do not like, some you can deal with, and some you cannot. If he shows up in the future, and you choose to give him a chance, make sure it is a fair chance, and make sure you go in with a clear picture of what is going on and why you are there.
Realize that the person you are present with is not who they were, and neither are you and because you care, you try to make it work but there is just too much that would not allow it. One thing you must understand is, you have changed each other whether for good or bad. Make sure your Change is for the better not worse, and if you feel a need to experience an unfinished chapter, do so but do not have your head in the clouds.
Sometimes you may love someone, but love is not what holds a relationship together. You need the right qualities that work for both of you. Know what you want and do not want. Know what you need to thrive in a relationship, and you must tap into your love because you cannot hold anyone more accountable for loving you than yourself.
If he comes back after he was dumped by his girlfriend, jilted, or for some other reason, Bear in mind that all he wants is a piece of you, not the whole you. He will have all the right words to say to you to get what he wants. The truth is, he will leave again. Most single men do it.
Dear girls, good men do care for their girls very much. But always remember they have their self-respect as well. Respect their feelings as they do yours.
Written: Juliana Jonathan
photo credit: Stockstutter.