Often Times I counsel people on relationships and I try to find out what really lead to the fights, misunderstanding, or even breakups, In the end it would all lead to “PRIVACY” and “TRUST”.
Privacy is the ability of an individual or group to seclude themselves, or information about themselves, and thereby express themselves selectively.
Trust is the reliance on the integrity of a person on a subject matter.
Trust and Privacy are two vital keys to the success of every relationship, How can you be in a relationship and there is no trust? I often tell people If you don’t trust your spouse, you don’t belong there. If he/she likes his privacy please know its time to walk away. Why would you be in a relationship and your partner hides you like a bottle of codeine or even tramadol and you still have the guts to defend him or her; My dear that is foolishness, Being in a relationship with someone is supposed to be a public affair, Why go into a relationship if you don’t have plans to marry the person?
I am stunned when people say I don’t go through my partners phone to avoid getting a heart attack, Its demeaning, Its unbelievable to see people still stay in such relationship, If they eventually get married it would continue on and on till someday the weaker partner would walk out, after all the efforts and sacrifices made. There is nothing like privacy in relationship, if you are dating someone, you have rights to their privacy, their phone, messages, social media accounts and all, if you can see each others nakedness, have sex multiple times, what other privacy are you talking about.
I have been in a relationship for over a year now, I and my partner we understand what relationship is al about We have each others phone passwords, passwords to our social media accounts, there’s transparency. breaking the barriers of respecting our privacy has been the key to the success of our relationship. It has perfected our trust level and as such there is no room for fights and misunderstandings. That doesn’t mean from time to time we don’t have hiccups in our relationship, we fix it as couples that’s why we are dating.
Relationship works best when you talk to each other instead of talking about each other, when its not working, let the bridge of effective communication be there. Be matured enough to sit and talk things over. if there is something you notice you don’t like, instead of getting angry over it, call your partner then discuss it with him or her, at the end of the end day, what would have led to chaos would be settled on the table of communication.
WRITTEN BY: Edafe Great Oghenemaro
Edafe Great Oghenemaro is Relationship Coach, popularly known on facebook as Mr. TPM (The Perfect Match) a facebook group he founded for the purpose of connecting people and touching lives, who have touched the lives of over 6000 Nigerians since it was created in February 2018.
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He can also be reached on facebook: Edafe Greatz Oghenemaro