Sex is a topic people often fail to discuss. They see it as sacred, not a thing to be discussed outside the bedroom. In as much as sex is the glue to every relationship, we should also know that communication is the key to getting what we you want. Often time than not, we find ourselves in relationships, were our partners’ libido is so high and they are always demanding for sex; they would never come to a compromise. Ladies, can I tell you a secret? Men always think when you say “NO” to them that means they are never going to get laid, now that is where communication comes to play.
Remember, “Sex is not just about the act; it is a special loving bond of our body”
Below are Tips on How to Improve Your Sex Life.
- Pick a pet name you want your partner to always call you in bed. Sex is supposed to be interesting and not boring.
- Cuddle more. Oh! This act helps the mid relax and prepare it for the next activity (sex) on the agenda…lol
- Foreplay should be done more often. Ask them the foreplay they enjoy most and make sure you give them to their satisfaction. No one should be subjected to giving the foreplay, both should be fully involved in it that is; giving and receiving.
- Stop playing hard to get; Stop hiding behind your computer; always remember, the work should be left in the office. Do not bring it to your bedroom.
- Make it fun. Remember when you started dating? Can you remember how great your sex life was? All those things you used to do, the crazy bedroom dance, how you dressed up for your partner? Try bringing those memories back. Just make sure you having sex is not like a “cock and hen” theirs may even be fun than yours because there’s a lot of chasing here and there before the sexual act takes place……lol
- Learn to communicate. As the saying goes, communication is the key to every successful relationship. Tell them what he/she is not doing right, tell them what works for you, tell them the sex position that makes you reach orgasm, do not assume they know, remember they are humans and not aliens, they don’t read minds.
Great sex does not just magically happen, you have to be clear and communicate exactly what you need in order to have the satisfying kind of relationship your dream of. Sex is not a thing to ashamed of because it is an important aspect of your life, I see no reason why couples cannot sit and talk about their sex life the same way they talk about the finance, and other aspect of their day to day activities.
Imagine your spouse is the workaholic, the type that brings office work to the bedroom, do you know what I will suggest you do? While he/she is busy with work, make sure your hand is busy down there and I bet you, they will immediately drop the laptop and attend to you. A quickie will not bite…lol. Try it and thank me later.
In as much as I would advise you do that, always watchout and understand your partner.
Couples should always learn to compromise for each other. It does not matter how hot and passionate the beginning of your relationship is, if you do not constantly work with your partner to make your flame go brighter, it will eventually burn out.
One thing that makes sex boring is you doing the same routine. It does not matter if you have sex on a daily basis, it become boring. A little switch in style will not bite. Try something you have not done before. E.g. (different sex style/position). Do not dwell on one routine.
There are two kinds of sex
- The recreational sex.
- The connecting sex.
The recreational sex is a sex meant only for the purpose of fun without any feelings attached and no form of commitment. You are just fond of each other and decide to go for it.
The connecting sex means being present with your partner and yourself in the moment, sharing that special bond and exploring more ways to understand and meet your partner’s need
In every relationship, there should be a little bit of both. (Connecting and Recreational sex) you can have both your needs met with both. Intimacy is vital to your relationship, lack of intimacy will make you resentful and it also have consequences.
Having a healthy sex is essential for survival of any relationship. What happens and what does not happen in your sex life, is totally up to you. Always try as much as possible to keep the passion alive. Research shows that, couple who create time at least three to four times a week to have sex have the greatest relationship satisfaction.
written by: JULIA JONATHAN